This ensures personalized care and attention, taking into account the individual’s history, preferences, and specific challenges to provide the most effective path to recovery. By doing these things, it’s possible to rebuild trust and demonstrate ongoing commitment to change. Generally speaking, people work through the Steps of Alcohol Anonymous with an addiction treatment counselor and/or sponsor. You can also turn to AA’s Big Book and Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions (the 12 & 12) for guidance specific to Step 8. The AA Big Book emphasizes the importance of being willing to make amends for the harm we have caused, while also avoiding causing further harm in the process. It encourages thoughtful and responsible actions in the process of making amends.

How Making Amends Benefits Your Recovery

Some people on this list may be harder to approach, so readiness is key. If willingness isn’t there yet, the program encourages asking a Higher Power for guidance until that willingness arises. One can start with those amends that may be easier and work their way up to the more challenging ones.

Addiction and Mental Health Resources

• Taking the time to let the other person express how they were affected can promote a more effective healing process, as well as make things less ‘about us’ and more about the person affected.
• Step 9 advises against making amends if it risks additional harm to the other party.
• The reason I give this disclaimer is making amends is a personal thing.
• It’s about making positive changes within yourself so that you don’t repeat old patterns of behavior that led to your broken relationships in the first place.
• Managing emotional responses without anger or defensiveness helps handle these challenges.

Through these restorative actions, you demonstrate your commitment to change. Making direct amends requires face-to-face interactions wherever possible, which shows sincerity, openness, and humility. These interactions are essential in rebuilding trust and promoting healing for both parties involved. However, it’s equally important to recognize when making amends might cause further harm. living amends meaning Step 9 advises against making amends if it risks additional harm to the other party.

Life can be good again and we’d like to show you how.

But what happens when the person you need to make amends with dies before you’re able to apologize and change your ways? Unfortunately, this scenario plays out much too often in the lives of people who didn’t get a chance to correct their mistakes and past behaviors in time. Making amends is ill-advised if it involves confessing to actions the other party is unaware of, as this can lead to unnecessary pain.

• Symbolic amends might be something you need to do if the person you harmed is no longer living or if establishing contact with them would cause more harm than good.
• Finally, your amends script should underline the commitment to change and transformation.
• If you need to pay someone back a thousand dollars (direct amends), make an agreement with them to work to do this.
• Apologizing is difficult for many people, and taking responsibility for your actions can be painful as it may remind you of the harm you have caused.
• This ongoing nature of making amends can lead to self-healing by alleviating the stress tied to previous behaviors, potentially averting relapse.

Holding on to those emotions will catch you in a storm you cannot outrun. An apology is expressing regret or saying sorry for causing harm to someone. Making an amend means taking accountability and action to repair any damages done.

Should I Work on Step Eight Alone?

• An important element of step nine is that those in recovery have already begun making amends to themselves by changing some of their behaviors, attitudes, and beliefs.
• Taking these actions helps us to separate ourselves from the disease of addiction.
• The person may not even remember the incidents in question from memory, but others may remember them quite well.
• If you are new to Celebrate Recovery, recognize that of the two main recovery programs (AA and CR), we will concentrate on the Christ-centered recovery program called Celebrate Recovery.
• When a loved one is in recovery, they are working on their mind, body, and spiritual connection to themselves and others.

This 8-week Bible study will help you build your quiet time with the Lord if you do not already have one established. They are being fulfilled among us—sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly. Cake offers its users do-it-yourself online forms to complete their own wills and Alcoholics Anonymous generalized educational content about wills. Many users would be better served consulting an attorney than using a do-it-yourself online form.